New mom vs 600 sq ft apartment

I love reading the real estate section in New York mag titled “Life Swap: What If You Left?” Like if you traded in your 600 sq ft, one bedroom apartment in Manhattan, you could get a 6,600 sq ft, four bedroom house in Ohio for the same price.

Yes, it’s sickening. And asks the question: why do people live in Manhattan when you can have so much more someplace else? Someone once told me, you stay in New York for one of three things “career, love, or money”. So obviously for me, it would be for love, and for my husband, it would be his career. But I think it’s more than that too.

This weekend, the thought crossed my mind that we might actually stay in the city (like forever). A year ago, that was an absurd impossibility. What do you mean stay in New York with kids? But I need a house, and a dining table, and a car in the suburbs. I need space with normal people. I want my kids to have a yard and play sports after school.

Well the more time I spend in the city, the less I want to eat at the same Italian or Mexican restaurant in the suburbs every Friday night. The less I want to drive 20 minutes to pick up milk. The less I want my kids to live in a sanitized fishbowl with other guppies that look and act just like them. (Future post about my fear of raising Gossip Girl kids to come.)

A friend gave me some great advice about having a baby in the city. Most importantly, she said think about what you NEED and what you don’t NEED. For example, you probably don’t need a baby monitor when your child sleeps 5 feet away from you. You probably don’t need BOTH a swing and a bouncer, because you just won’t have the space. On the other hand, you NEED to invest in a really great stroller because walking 50 streets or 5 miles isn’t so out of the ordinary.

Sure, more living space is my biggest concern (Need? Want? Need?). I’d love to be decorating a nursery for my son instead of squeezing his portable crib into a corner in our room. I’d much rather be picking out nursery furniture than cleaning out a drawer in my own dresser to store his little wardrobe. But with the going rate for an additional 100 sq ft bedroom at $1000 more per month, I don’t think my son NEEDs his own room right now.

The good news is that instead of his own room, I can give my son so much more just by living in New York. I’ll give him the Highline and Hudson River Park. I’ll give him music class, kids yoga, and Billy’s Bakery. I’ll give him swim lessons at Chelsea Piers or skateboarding at the skate park or mini-golf at Pier 25. I’ll give him the Bronx Zoo and Central Park Zoo. I’ll give him the dinosaurs at the Natural History Museum. I’ll give him the beach at grandma’s and grandpa’s in the summer and ice skating at Rockefeller Center or Bryant Park in the winter.

Maybe one day, I’ll decide I really do need the space and move out of the city (like many parents before us). But for now, I think we have everything we need.